meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
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