So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Randomize
