omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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