I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
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