good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
