Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
