Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(847): View more from Illinois

we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(847): we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us. http://tfl.nu/woip

Replies (11) Good night (412) Bad night (1159) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(310): View more from California

I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(310): I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets. http://tfl.nu/76ec

Replies (16) Good night (695) Bad night (2729) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(860): View more from Connecticut

Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(860): Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god. http://tfl.nu/co52

Replies (30) Good night (1262) Bad night (10073) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(760): View more from California

Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(760): Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some... http://tfl.nu/wqbb

Replies (18) Good night (5211) Bad night (826) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(303): View more from Colorado

friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(303): friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension http://tfl.nu/bl0j

Replies (46) Good night (1613) Bad night (5033) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(506): View more from New Brunswick

Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(506): Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess http://tfl.nu/9ahd

Replies (29) Good night (3159) Bad night (883) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(920): View more from Wisconsin

Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(920): Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices? http://tfl.nu/95d8

Replies (8) Good night (2951) Bad night (1196)
Favorite
(360): View more from Washington

True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(360): True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not? http://tfl.nu/5au2

Replies (4) Good night (2087) Bad night (868) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(615): View more from Tennessee

The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(615): The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment. http://tfl.nu/6ofo

Replies (7) Good night (1968) Bad night (731) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(561): View more from Florida

Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(561): Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose? http://tfl.nu/uaga

Replies (10) Good night (455) Bad night (750) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(512): View more from Texas

Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(512): Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick. http://tfl.nu/ysyl

Replies (11) Good night (459) Bad night (3197)
Favorite
(402): View more from Nebraska

Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(402): Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day. http://tfl.nu/rkpb

Replies (6) Good night (466) Bad night (1311) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(256): View more from Alabama

I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(256): I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud http://tfl.nu/dlrj

Replies (12) Good night (1512) Bad night (429)
Favorite
(832): View more from Houston, Texas

You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(832): You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life. http://tfl.nu/rg4t

Replies (3) Good night (1020) Bad night (398)
Favorite
(256): View more from Alabama

I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(256): I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though. http://tfl.nu/tmsk

Replies (1) Good night (663) Bad night (219)

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: