You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
