Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
