I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
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