I must be too annoying 4 u.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
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If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
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This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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