I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
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