Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
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