Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Randomize
