I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
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