She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize