Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
