lets start a swedish sibling band together
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Randomize
