It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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