Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
