first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
she woke up with a sticky ear
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize