Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
