Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
