Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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