You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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