is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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