mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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