he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
