Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Randomize
