Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Randomize
