what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
