If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
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