dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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