Your tits are I can't wait for
I think i peed on brittanys purse
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
