I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
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