You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Randomize