i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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