You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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