So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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