I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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