Already got asked if we're dating
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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