she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
