Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Randomize
