Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
What a fucking waste of an outfit
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
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