the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
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