where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
