You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
