Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
