We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Randomize
