Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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