used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Randomize
