I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
